NOT the way to continue this conversation..

A few months ago I went out to a suburban club.  I danced with a bunch of guys, my girlfriends I was there with and had a grand old time generally.  However, on 3 seperate occasions I had an identical conversation with men.

I had told each of these men that I was married (their actions indicated to me that they wanted to do more then dance). 

They then asked me why I was out on my 'own' (even though I was with 3 girlfriends).  When I answered with something like - "Because I want to be" (Incredulous look, pissed off tone).

They then said "If you were mine I wouldn't let you out by yourself"".

The tone was fully intended as a compliment, like if I was theirs they couldn't bare to have me unaccompanied by their manly selves...


Oh vomit. It shows how fucked up things are when men think this a good thing to say to a woman.

Link-o-rama

Damn right!
http://mymilkspilt.wordpress.com/2010/06/14/breastfeeding-is-a-feminist-issue/

Down Under Feminist Carnival - yea.  One day I will be brave enough to nominate myself.  When I've written something I'm a little in love with I think.
http://rachelhills.tumblr.com/post/665473491/the-best-of-the-rest-of-the-blogosphere-down-under-femin

The way Blue Milk writes is just so...right. 
http://bluemilk.wordpress.com/2010/06/12/the-love-and-the-hate/
I think she is brave for writing this, because when I have expressed simlair things to other people they seem SHOCKED that you could hate parenting, or loathe that your child is awake.  Because us parents, especially us mothers, we are martyrs and sacrifice ourselves on the altar of our kids - bleurgh!.

Thoughts on vulvas, what we do to them and how this fits in to our current culture (western, privileged culture)
http://thedawnchorus.wordpress.com/2010/05/24/nick-cut/


This really says everything I need to say about consent and how the patriarchy works against it.  And maybe how women are taught about consent.  It's not just yes and no.
http://jezebel.com/5550321/why-the-kendra-wilkinson-sex-tape-should-make-you-angry

Women's friendships with women.  Did you learn how to deal with conflict?
http://thehathorlegacy.com/women-solidarity-and-no-conflict-ever-programming/

Take two, and teaspooning

Okay.

Hi again, loyal readers *waves*

So I did plan to post regularly and you can see what has happened with regards to that.

So take two on the regular posting and we'll see how we go from here.
I think I am (as always) too ambitious and then I get overwhlemed so do nothing! Hence, just a short post today.

I've done a bit of teaspooning this(scroll to teaspooning) week.  Just a little one, but important. 

My lovely Dad, and my lovely husband both made a couple of off-the-cuff comments to other males about "Not being a girl" or "How's your ovaries" and "Stop being a girl".  Y'know the comments that use girl/female/so called feminine behaviour as an insult. I told them that this was not appropriate and by saying those comments they were saying that being a girl was worse then being a man.  I said that I don't want my daughter exposed to that type of comment. My Dad seemed to take it on board, at least I think he will curb those comments around my daughter and his other grandchildren.  My husband, stubborn, argumentative love that he is, didn't really get it, but seems to understand that I find it offensive and will curb it on the basis of that. 

So my little act of teaspooning for the week.  It was both easier and harder than I thought it would be.

Link-o-rama

Down Under Feminist Carnival
Much food for thought

Schrodingers rapist
I. can't. begin. to. explain. how. awesome. this. post. is.
READ IT!  Make the men in your life read it.
To one day be able to express myself thus...

Go Fug Yourself
Snarky fashion commentary - coz us hairy feminists laugh too, believe it or not!

Teaspoons aren't enough
The small stuff counts.  Also, FYI Teaspoons refer to taking a teaspoon out of the ocean - it may not seem to be doing much, but if we all did it, then we could empty the ocean (of sexism, patriarchy, ableism etc etc)

Target Women: Beauty Contraptions
Tee hee.  9306 times.  Times what?  LOL


Enjoy - and more coming soon - Rape Culture - Part Deux and Breastfeeding - boobies, boobies, boobies!

Rape Culture - some scenarios

Rape culture - Scenario 1.

 

 

 

 

What is rape culture? What does it mean? How does it affect your day to day life?

 

People much smarter, more eloquent and sucicint then I, have defined rape culture - check out some definitions here and here.

 

So I want to discuss the rape culture that I see. This is not the things that are maybe the most obvious and these are not things that come from those Rapists that are identifiable threats - you know the drunk guy in the alley way with the knife.

 

These are things that I see in men (and women). Men and women that I really like and that for most cases, love, adore and respect. It's not that these people are assholes, it's that because we live in a rape culture, they don't realise (and neither did I for a long time) that this shit sounds acceptable because just about everybody is doing it! A few scenarios to help us on our way...the first after the jump...

 

Feminisim 101

So - I identify as a feminist.

I used to say 'No I'm not a feminist, I'm for equality". Mainly because that word "Feminist" was too confronting, too on the offense for the majority of people I speak to. And I did not have the knowledge to argue further.

But now I'm trying to learn. And I understand the Feminism is all about Equality. And I'm trying to live my life with a little more "Hey, not cool" when I see patriarchy, misogyny and rape culture going on.

But I'm learning, and I'm navigating my way through to my own brand of feminism. And I have a lot of reading to do on theory, of which I have done pretty much nada.

And the point is...

Not much really...
I like to rant, and I have much to rant about.
So I thought I would rant here...
Expect to see biased, poorly constructed ranting on, but not limited to: feminisim, motherhood, men, horses, dogs, dickheads, my daughter, my family, my nieces and nephews, fire season, awareness, jobs, dis-ability, 4WDs, vaginas, how models should embrace pasta, chips and sandwiches, how stillettos are evil but I cant help but buy they are so pretty, food, how I used to be hot, raunch culture and things that are fugly. And ranting.