Men, I am not against you, I am for you.

Dear Men

I am a feminist. I do not hate you.  I am not against you.  I am for you!

I am for you being shown as stronger than your sexual urges; I know you can think beyond skin, short skirts, fuckability, your dick.  I know you are able to think about whether your need for sex trumps other persons autonomy.  I stand with you against that shit.

I am for you being smart and capable.  Ads that show you as stupid, incapable of figuring out laundry are terrible.  You are smart and intelligent and adult.  I am for you being shown as capable in spheres outside your workplace, especially housework and parenting.  If you can build a house, run a company, balance the books, you can figure out how to change a diaper or run a vacuum cleaner.  I stand with you, sharing the load. 

I am for you being encouraged to show your emotions.  You are not less than because you cry, because you hug, because you kiss someone the same gender as you.  I am for you showing your vulnerability, I stand with you against stoic stereotypes.

I am for you having equal parenting rights, especially when it comes to part time work and work culture.  You should be able to have rights to part time/job-share work on par with your female counterparts who are parents. You should have equal leave rights when it comes to newborns. This should not only be enshrined in legislation but work culture as well.  I stand with you against father equalling full time working missing out on your children absentee.  Fuck that.

I am for you, I love you and the patriarchy fucks you over just as much as it does us.  I stand with you, strong and staunch.

NB: I apologise for the heteronormativity of the above - I did it delibrately to make an impact.  I apologise for erasing certain peoples and populations.